Saturday, 7 May 2011

Actors Against Gravity: Costner and Russo Laugh To Hide The Tears

Golf Pro. Love Amateur. Gravity Sufferer.

Another high profile Hollywood name to fall victim to the Earth's most powerful force became apparent this week. The poster for 1996's Tin Cup, praised by the Los Angeles Times as "dispiritingly conventional and obvious", shows the two leads sharing a moment of light-hearted warmth. Perhaps Rene Russo told her co-star that joke that she knows. However, no amount of smiling can gloss over the worrying position of Kevin Costner. He has found himself at a quite unfeasible angle as he tries to enjoy life at a permanent 45 degree slant.

Russo seems to serves two purposes in this poster. The first is to act as a guide of as near to an upright angle as is possible in a romcom poster. This highlights the ludicrous nature of Costner's stance. The second seems to be physically pulling Costner away from an even more absurd angle. It is unclear how strong Rene Russo actually is but she appears to be pulling her co-star up to a workable angle by only using a three finger grip on his right forearm.

Sources close to Costner indicate that his move away from the limelight in recent years may be down to his struggle with gravity. One source goes further and claims that the Dances With Wolves star spends up to 8 hours a night lying at an entirely horizontal angle.

A disheartening development as the fight to find a cure continues!

Together we can defeat gravity!


  1. i'm delighted to find someone finally taking this issue seriously. i myself have spent my career as a plastic surgeon battling the effects of gravity, especially with reference to the thoractic areas of older women like rene russo.

  2. I'm glad to have a fellow soldier on the frontline of this war.